I pride myself on not having a favorite this or a most hated that, but I have to admit that the thing I hate to hear the most is "what do you do in your spare time?"
It makes me defensive. Why do you care? Are you really listening? Would you like to join me in a "spare time activity?"
It makes me feel ashamed. I don't like to do anything in my spare time. Rather I like to do nothing in my spare time. Rather, I like to sit around, watch TV, eat food, drink alcohol and wax nostalgic in my spare time. So you can see why I don't want to share this information with people, because what I like to do is be private. That would be a rude answer, however, so over the years of antisocialism, I've come up with a few "hobbies" to feed the people who get off on that sort of thing.
For the fill in the blank "what are your hobbies", I give them: cooking, reading, writing, riding horses.
For those "ice-breaker-what-are-your-hobbies" nosy people, I give them: socializing, traveling, cooking, reading.
It's such a cliche question to break the ice with. I always lie, and I do it because that's my chance to forge their opinion of me. I can make them think I'm anyone I want just by telling them what I want them to hear, or what I know they want to hear. So elementary.
My method of getting to know someone is to ask them what TV show they like best. I find it's a better indicator of their personality.
Shows like In the Heat of the Night mean walk away. OC? Walk away. Simpsons? Now we have a conversation.
I've just come to realize that not everyone can be as great as me and my close circle of friends and accepted family, and while tolerance should be practiced, I'm not gonna preach it. I say divide and conquer.
5 comments:
The term "rather" is becoming a cliche'. What do you think a good "ice breaker" would be Ms. Don't ask me what my hobbies are?!!!!
Listen here, I read your little "blog" and didn't feel that "what is your favorite TV show" was a good ice breaker. What are you going to do, come and watch TV with me? I doubt it.
Trish, I think I'm going to have to recommend counseling.
;)
From: Adrian (A.K.A IT2 Sizemore)
Subject: "So, what are your hobbies?"
After reading your blog, I was wandering if the social obligation your wrote about, "breaking the ice", is nothing more than a mere procedure for the breakee, simply procured by the mutual feeling of sheer boredom of your presence. Certainly the first few words from your mouth has as much interest and excitement as your assailant’s. Don’t confuse the contractual agreement for politeness as a genuine concern for interest. There may be some people who are actually interested in your hobbies or what you do on your free time, but roling your eyes and tabulating your criticisms in your head certainly indicates that your free time and hobbies are inherently insignificant and probably don’t deserve to be mentioned anyway. Although striking up conversations about current events, or the ideological differences between those who have made it there hobby to do things worth mentioning and those who are too pompous to dare mention it, pales in comparison to extrapolating the moral and intellectual content from a Simpsons cartoon. Don’t be too quick to dismiss a small conversation before you know the worth. Every moment can be an opportunity, which in my opinion, is too costly of a price to pay for egotism.
And here I thought that all your free time was used up with watching reruns of "Sex in the City".
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